Career Testing
Career Testing
Career Testing
CELEBRITIES / JAN. 21, 2015
version 6, draft 6

5 Millionaire App Developers

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Smart mobile devices have fundamentally and unequivocally changed day to day life. Mainly it has made blankly staring at a screen with seven other people doing the exact same while paying for a $15 cosmopolitan (or whatever alcoholic drink is in vogue now, I usually drink by myself in the dark while crying about my past indiscretions) socially acceptable. For a certain sector of the population, each blank stare, each twitchy game playing mass transit commuter is as good as money in the bank.

These are 5 millionaire app developers that are raking it in!

1. Instagram: 1 billion dollars

Kevin Systrom is not a sci-fi villain even though his name indicates otherwise. No, no he is much more heinous. He is the man to blame for the onslaught of food photography that has plagued social media for the few past years. He is the man that gave hipsters the platform to photograph their mustaches and bicycles with pretentiously artistic filters. He is the sub-human that opened the door to circular shots of peoples’ feet in sepia tones. How, you ask does society reward such villainy? With a cool billion dollars of course.

2. Fruit Ninja: 3 Million+ dollars (conservatively)

This game has given more people carpal tunnel disease that another repetitive action you do while by yourself. What?! I was talking about whisking eggs, good grief gutter-head. I can’t be the only one that whisks eggs to relax. Anyway the company behind Fruit Ninja, Halfbrick, has created multiple widely popular games but to date F.N. has proven their most profitable. The game is self-published, self-funded and self-created. A self-made app to keep you self-occupied with repetitive motion. There’s a dirty joke in there somewhere but I just can’t put my finger on it.

3. iFart: $2 million

Really? REALLY?! We have a device in our pocket that is much more powerful than the technology that put man on the moon and we use it to make fart noises? Yes, two million people that have a bottomless well of information at their fingertips, chose to use said ’well of information’ to imitate flatulence. At least there was still someone smart enough to profit off of this obscene misuse of computing power.

4. Minecraft: 33 million dollars

Before the fan-boys lose their minds, I understand that Minecraft is a cross platform game available for console, PC and mobile device. That $33 million? That’s just from the sales of the “pocket” version of the game. According to creator Markus “Notch” Persson his goal was to make enough money from the game to pay the bills and allow him to continue developing further game ideas. Mission accomplished Notchy-boy, mission accomplished. Oh, maybe I should mention that the property was sold to this little company you might have heard of called Microsoft for the miniscule amount of 2.5 billion dollars.

5. Summly: 18 million British Pounds

This envy inducing 17 year old came up with an app that summarizes headlines in just a few lines of text. It wasn’t even young Nick D’ Aloisio’s first venture into the app development market, but it proved to be his most profitable. Shortly after Summly was given Apple App Store’s App of the Year, multiple companies swooped in to buy the property. Yahoo not only bought the app for £18 million, it also gave D’Aloisio a job. From a kid hasn’t even finished his senior finals.

Have you heard of a multi-million dollar app developer that I left out of my list? Let me know in the comment section below.

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