If you have ever been fired or laid off, you know how "blue" you can get. You start to doubt your abilities as a professional or even as an individual, and you often find that your motivation is running low. Many unemployed people slip into a depression that’s quite difficult to escape.
See Also: Top 10 Ways to Be More Confident at Work
Is your spouse going through a hard time thanks to their unemployment? Until he or she gets a job, you’re the only one that can help them deal with the lack of confidence and moodiness that accompanies being unemployed. It’s going to be tough, but you can help them to have a more positive outlook on life if you go about it the right way.
1. Help them get past it
The fact that they were fired or laid off does "suck", but that’s in the past. Your task now is to help your spouse look toward the future--your future, together, as a family. Remind him/her of goals you set together, or plans you have made. Get their eyes off what lies behind them, and help them focus on what lies ahead.
2. Remind them that it's only temporary
Yes, they may be unemployed NOW, but that doesn’t mean another great opportunity isn’t just around the corner. Being unemployed is a temporary condition that they can deal with. It will be hard work, but the two of you together will be able to get through it.
3. Give them the time off
If your spouse is like so many other professionals around, they probably got a job straight out of college and haven’t taken a break in years. Instead of looking at this unemployment period as a bad thing, why not treat it like a mini-vacation? Your spouse can take a week or three off to do whatever he/she chooses, and only THEN should they start to look for another job. Instead of treating it as a bad thing, help them see it as a welcome break from the stressful life they’ve been leading.
4. Manage Guilt Together
Many people feel guilty that they aren’t contributing to their family or that they’re not working like they should be. As the spouse, you need to help them fight those guilty feelings. Help them realize that they are a valuable part of your team, and that they have no reason to feel guilty about a bit of bad luck.
5. Help them feel important
There is nothing more embarrassing for a hard-working professional than being out of work. Even if their joblessness has nothing to do with their skills or abilities, they may see it as a failure. You need to remind the person of how important they are--not because they make money, but because they are the person you fell in love with all those years ago.
To help your spouse feel important, ask him/her to do tasks that you aren’t able to get around to due to your job. Even things like running errands, caring for your children, or fixing the house can give them a sense of purpose and build their confidence. The worst thing for an unemployed person is to spend a lot of their time sitting around doing nothing.
6. Seduce Them
This may sound silly, but for most people, their confidence is closely linked to both their job performance and their sex appeal. Men, in particular, need to feel that they at least have one of the two going on. If your man (or woman) is unemployed, a good way to boost their confidence is via sex. Flirting with him/her, giving them affection, initiating romance, and proving that they are desirable is an excellent way to keep up their confidence!
EVERYONE survives periods of being unemployed. Sooner or later, a job is bound to come around for him/her. For now, it’s all about helping your spouse to survive the tough times! The tips above will help you get through it together.
Got any tips on how to keep up your spouse’s confidence while they are unemployed? Leave a comment below and let us know…