SUCCESS STORIES / APR. 25, 2015
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How Your Family Traditions Can Make You a Loser or a Success Story

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So we can blame our family for a lot of things: bringing us into this miserable existence for one, irreversibly damaging us at an early age that carries through to adulthood, having issues if they didn’t show enough affection and issues if they showed too much. We’re basically screwed and flawed humans make other flawed humans and the story continues, but can your family make you a winner or a loser? Well let’s just take a look.

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Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting is exactly what it sounds like with a shiny academic (see pompous) candy wrapper. It is basically what I call “Pushover Parenting”. You know the kid that is screaming about the absence of gummy worms, for the 7 hours of your 6.5 hour transatlantic flight? What did the parent do? Nothing? Well there my friend is a teeth gnashing example of Permissive Parenting.  It is defined by two things, being warm and reluctantly (see never) imposing borders and limits. This results in demon spawn that is selfish and have an aversion to responsibility. Another joyous effect is that children who are subjected to this type of parenting generally have extreme reactions to social conflicts and interactions when their demands aren’t met. You are creating the next Justin Bieber by allowing your kid to get away with murder, and if that doesn’t terrify your gonads into refusing to create genetic material necessary for procreation, then may God have mercy on your soul.

Their Name

No seriously something as seemingly asinine as a name can influence whether your child is prone for success or a life of attempting to become a ‘Youtube’ star and living in your basement. If that wasn’t a horrifyingly enough image or perspective for your perfect little pink bundle of joy, ponder this: there are linguistically low-status names. Meaning they are names of lower status and the person possessing them can actually be perceived as being less capable than his/her peers. For example it would be fine if you named your child Timothy, but if you spelt it like so: Timathee, although it is original it also shows that the child might have been born to a lower class family or a mother that was a high-school drop-out. Why you ask? Because strange spelling and awkward letter combinations (kz, qua, lo, ta and apostrophized names) are rarely used in the middle class name. Sure it’s an unfair cultural bias, but even teachers treat children with names like that differently. Oh, and if you name your daughter Alex, Skylar or something equally gender neutral, you are actually giving them a better chance at succeeding in a male dominated profession. Don’t give your boy an androgynous name though because this will probably result in adverse pre-adolescent behavior. Also, you should be put in jail if you’re considering calling your little boy Elizabeth, after his late aunt.

Being uninvolved, under-involved or over-involved

People have this uncanny way of distorting their realities to protect themselves. Egotism, selfishness and Narcissism are all defence mechanisms for people with both inflated self-worth or low self-worth. Guess who helps them develop that, you guessed it their parents. So next time you meet an intolerable douche that only talks about his investment portfolio, his car and his intolerably hot wife, don’t get angry because it’s really not his fault.   

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Are there any other ways that parents can unintentionally mess up their kids? Let us know in the comment section below.

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