JOB SEARCH / DEC. 04, 2015
version 11, draft 11

The Most Ridiculous Job Requirements Ever Posted

As jobseekers, we have come across some of the most ridiculous job ads, whether it’s on a professional job board or something like Craigslist. What makes these job ads ridiculous? The requirements that some employers have, such as working for free or working an incredible number of hours for little pay. Of course, it doesn’t necessarily stop there (as you will see). 

See AlsoTop Worst Job Ads 

With the way the online world is, it can sometimes be acceptable to come across an absurd, head scratching job ad. At least it provides us with some entertainment and a chuckle or two. But to come across as many as we have over the last decade or so is just astounding, and frustrating when you need to find a job fast. 

Unfortunately, it just seems to get worse over time, but that’s because there are people who are desperate or curious enough to respond and actually abide by some of the requirements, even if it’s just for a few bucks. We can’t judge those who apply to these employment opportunities. We all need some dough to pay our bills. 

Nevertheless, here are 13 of the most ridiculous job ad requirements ever posted:

1. Exposure For Your Work

How many times have writers come across this ad? The job poster will inform the writer that they will have to compose three articles per day that range betwen 500 and 1,000 words. The article will supposedly be seen by 15,000 people every single day. Many of the article titles will be compelling, the ad says. Well, by the time you reach to the bottom of the ad, you are told that this is an unpaid gig, but with plenty of exposure.

Um, how will this exposure pay for the rent? Are we supposed to tell our landlord that we’re getting paid in exposure? Oy vey...

2. Coding to the Max Times 5

If you’re a savvy and dependable coder then we want you, the ad would normally start out. Unfortunately, the ad only gets worse from there. The employer wants you to code three to five times faster than your peers. In fact, they want you to code around the clock at a rapid pace. Yikes!

3. Experience With a Fax Machine

The job ad might as well require experience with telegrams. Outside of medical offices, what other business employs the antiquated technology of fax machines? If your business does happen to have a fax machine then it’s time to think about investing in new technology for your company!

4. A Decade of Social Media Experience

Social media is only about a decade old so it’s confounding to come across ads that ask for this much experience. No adult has this much experience. You know who has this much experience using the likes of Twitter, Facebook and maybe MySpace from the very beginning? Teenagers and younger millennials. Besides, social media is constantly changing and new outlets come about. So no one is actually an expert in this field.

5. 5 Years of Experience for an Entry Level Job

An entry level job is usually meant as such: an entry level job. You’re starting out in the industry and the employment opportunity is marketed to those coming out of college or changing careers. When a job ad asks for applicants to have five years of experience then it really defeats the purpose of an entry level job.

6. Bachelor's Degree for Serving Food

Believe it or not, many of the major fast-food chains (we won’t name names) are now requesting that their front-line employees have some sort of university or college degree. This made headlines a couple of years ago. Why would anyone need a Bachelor’s Degree to ask: "would you like fries with that?" How befuddling!

7. 5+ Years of Experience With Windows 10

Uh...did you know that Windows 10 only recently came out? How could anyone have a minimum of five years worth of experience, working with Windows 10. If you want to get technical then it’s rather likely that the engineers only started working on the new operating system a short period of time ago.

8. Rockstar, Ninja or Guru Wanted

Many of us just shake our heads when we come across job postings that ask for rockstars, ninjas or gurus. If a company is including these terms to describe their next employee then it’s not worth embarrassing yourself. Pass.

9. Hiring Right Now

...at this very minute. If you’re browsing through the job ads on a Friday afternoon, some of the posters will demand that you start work right away as soon as you apply. In other words, once you shoot over your resume, you’ll be assigned some tasks to complete, which means you’ll have to work over the weekend. This is more so for freelancers.

10. You Must Follow ALL Demands

One job (courtesy of Forbes) really proves the fact that some employers really have a long list of demands. If you don’t meet them then you’ll likely be fired almost immediately without any warning. Here is the ad:

“Any of the following will be grounds for immediate dismissal during the probationary period: coming in late or leaving early without prior permission; being unavailable at night or on the weekends; failing to meet any goals; giving unsolicited advice about how to run things; taking personal phone calls during work hours; gossiping; misusing company property, including surfing the internet while at work; submission of poorly written materials; creating an atmosphere of complaint or argument; failing to respond to emails in a timely way; not showing an interest in other aspects of publishing beyond editorial; making repeated mistakes; violating company policies. DO NOT APPLY if you have a work history containing any of the above.”

We all make mistakes from time to time. It’s apparent that in this job, there is zero room for error. Beware!

11. On Call All the Time

Unless you’re a doctor or EMT, there really is no need for a lot of jobs in the world to be on call all the time. However, if you’re a social media expert or an accountant, there are many employers that will require you to work all hours of the day, or at least be on call at any time on any day. Receive a call at 3 a.m.? Well, you better get working.

12. You May Experience Death

One job ad warns the applicant that it will not take any responsibility in the event that you die on the job. In this government job ad, it is warned that death rates are between 15 and 60 percent. Since there are no prevention methods or cures, you’ll likely die. Oh, by the way, this job ad was posted in the year 1665.

13. $1 for 1,000 words

What’s worse than companies that want to hire writers for nothing? Job ads that want to pay you $1 for 1,000 words or more. For those interested, just scan through the likes of Elance, Upwork, oDesk, Freelancer or Craigslist and you’ll find an abundance of these jobs. If you can write 1,000 words in five minutes then perhaps this job is for you!

See Also: Research Reveals What Makes A Perfect Job Ad 

In a highly competitive job market, some professionals have to go above and beyond the scope and scale of the position. However, some of the requirements that employers have are just too much. Perhaps the requirements wouldn’t be so bad if the company decided to pay a lot higher than they are willing to. With that being said, the best way to change the current way of posting job ads: don’t respond to them. They’ll eventually get the message. 

What’s next? Cleaning poop for a few measly dollars?

What was the worst job ad you’ve ever seen? Let us know in the comments section... 

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