How to Steer Clear from Grudges in the Workplace

Is there someone you hold a grudge against in the workplace? Well, most of us would hate to admit it but deep down inside, we’re aware of some deep seated squabbles we’ve had to deal with lately. From a constantly offensive workmate to an annoying and domineering boss. It’s like life designed the workplace to have that proverbial perpetual balance between sensible working colleagues and perfect A-holes. And when such people offend us to our breaking point, they tempt us to...

Gang up to prove a point

Besides holding subliminal resentment towards an individual’s misdemeanour, there’s a high possibility that you’re not the only one that shares the same sentiments. Chances are, you’ll get caught up in some close knit group of workmates that share a common ying and yang of workplace affairs. And since there’s strength in numbers, this close knit subliminal group is likely to gang up against that annoying individual to prove a point. This can range from gossip and slander to framing the individual in some serious breach of work policy in a bid to make them look bad, or even lose their job.

But what’s the point really?

I was once told that you should never wrestle with a pig. Yes, you’ll both get dirty, but the pig will always enjoy it. And when it comes to settling scores in the workplace, there are definitely some individuals that like getting down and dirty. They find pleasure in taking others down with them considering their kamikaze don’t care attitude. So yes, you’re trying to prove a point but in fact, you’ll have ignited a bruising battle that unfortunately, will make you lose more than you intended. Besides your precious peace of mind, you’ll have started a lifetime ’beef’ that’s likely to run for years to come.

And that’s just the tip of the Iceberg…

I occasionally congregate with some friends during the weekends for some drinks. And when they get tipsy, they open up about workplace squabbles they’ve had to encounter thanks to workmates that make their jobs a living hell. And despite the fact that they’re eager to prove a point, there are indeed some negative repercussions that hold them back. This person might even make it really personal and turn what was once a negligible workplace misdemeanour into this personal quest to quash the involved party by whatever means necessary. And yes, they might even go as far as committing a felony because as we all know, professional hardcore criminals usually pose as good, ordinary hardworking folks.... so how about we try to avoid such situations by asking ourselves:

How does one steer clear from grudges in the workplace?

Not that it’s a fact but, we’ll always encounter someone striving to destabilize and bring out the worst in us. Some are in fact so miserable that the only company they can afford is the attention brought about by their deliberate offensive tactics. That’s why you should:

#1 Learn to confront your rage, lose gracefully and move on

It’s quite hard to move on especially when someone plays foul and gets away with it. But in life, there’s more than one way of winning if you look at it from different angles. For instance, this annoying individual might actually be winning when you tag along in the battle. Maybe the only battle you need to deal with is the tempting retaliation brought about by your uncontrollable rage. And in the game of maturity, those who lose gracefully and move on are actually more admired than those who play dirty by whatever means to win like spoilt little brats.

#2 Exercise professional discipline and tolerance at all times

Habitual and repeated offense by a rogue workmate tempts us to break the rules and play dirty. But you never know who is watching. Maybe it’s a superior seeking to promote someone with serious knack for professional rationality and tolerance despite occasional workplace upheavals. Or it might even be as simple as winning favour and admiration amongst your workmates for your commendable professionalism and tolerance despite obvious signs of a squabble bursting out of proportions. The possibilities are endless...

#3 Choose your battles carefully

Sometimes people offend us because of envy, malice or even pure hatred. This is may be largely attributed to their personal perceptions regarding you. And to be honest, there’s really nothing much you can do IF you’re not deliberately offending them. That’s why it’s essential to ignore derogatory efforts meant to bring you down just for the sake of it. Plus, if things get out of hand, I’m sure every organization has policies regarding settling of workplace squabbles.

The moment you walk into the office, there will likely be two kinds of people. There are those who will eagerly exchange pleasantries. Then there are those who will hide in the corner plotting their next move in bringing you down. But ultimately, it’s your life and your career as well. And you can’t experience real progress if every offending situation brings about an urge to hold a grudge. As Winston Churchill once put it, "you cannot reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks."

Sourced Image: Office Argument