How to Know if You Are Emotionally Intelligent

Emotionally intelligent people are individuals who have cultivated a firm control of their emotions and the level with which they display their emotions in relationships and interactions with others. People who know how to stay calm in a crisis, can read other people’s emotional states, and maintain healthy and strong relationships—are emotionally intelligent individuals. This article will address how to know if you are an emotionally intelligent person.

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1. Calm During Crisis Situations

The first facet of being an emotionally intelligent person is to stay calm during a crisis situation. This is accomplished by honing your leadership skills and becoming an enthusiastic leader who wants to lead by example. Leading by example involves providing confident solutions and delegating rather than barking commands. A calm leader knows how to mesh a healthy emotional mindset with intelligent ideas in order to bring about a sense of security both in and out of crisis situations. Throughout this situation, a person with emotional intelligence remains calm, cool and collected emotionally.

2. Read Emotional Status Well

The second facet of an emotionally intelligent person is that this individual knows how to read the emotional status of other people. This skill is cultivated by the person becoming skilled at active listening. For example, people with a high emotional IQ know how to hear words and actually listen to the conversation and derive the correct context and perspective of the other person. Generally, this person is not confused or part of any communication breakdowns. Additionally, if you want to learn how to read emotions that other people exhibit, you need to have an affinity for understanding personality types and why people act the way they do. You will hone the art of understanding body language, personal nuances and excel at people watching. Emotionally intelligent people know how to let their guard down and can comfortably speak to friends, family and complete strangers. Talking to all types of people and a variety of relationship types will help the learning process. The final component is that you are proactive in helping people and like people in general. For example, if you are more of a loner, you will not engage enough with people in order to properly hone your people-reading skills.

3. Maintain Healthy Relationships

The third facet of knowing if you are emotionally intelligent is whether or not you have actual experience in maintaining healthy and strong relationships. This process of relationship-building begins by understanding your strengths and weaknesses and knowing how to improve your own emotional health and well-being. If you want to understand why other people are upset, you first need to understand the reasons for your own annoyance over issues. For example, you know you are emotionally intelligent if you are not weighed down by negative self-talk in your mind. You can see beyond the circumstance and why you reacted the way you did. Also, you are not afraid to be completely honest with yourself. People with a high emotional IQ can leave the mistakes and offenses of the past in the past and move forward with peace of mind and a desire to improve themselves and forgive others. Past baggage will not weigh you down. In this vein of thought, emotionally intelligent people also know how to stay positive and in tune with the present moment and don’t get completely freaked out about the future with paralyzing fear.

MindTools.com has created a short online quiz to measure your emotional intelligence quotient. Simply respond to 15 short statements, get your score and review what your score says about you. How well do you rate as an emotionally intelligent individual?