How to Use Fat-Shaming to Promote Yourself (and Fail)

Fat-shaming is the latest hype word, and justifiably so, because no one has the right to make fun of someone’s weight, appearance, or personality. The problem is that when something is being hyped, there is that special type of a**hole that is going to try to capitalize on it in one way or another, no matter how hateful. And don’t even dare claim that you were fat-shaming because you’re “keeping it real” – the only “real” thing about you is the fact that you are a douchebag. So, here’s how to use fat-shaming to promote yourself but then miserably fail.

See Also: Hate for Sale: The Surprisingly Dark White Supremacist Market

1. Nicole Arbour

You know that one girl everyone has hung out with who always says something extremely critically mean and then punctuates it with “Aww, just kidding”? That is passive aggressive bullshit. You cannot say: “Your corrective eyewear makes you look like Woody Allen ate your face and then pooped that thing you call a face… Aww, just kidding”! See, the whole vile, vindictive deal about film director excrement is not null and voided by the utterance of “just kidding”… f*ck you.

Well, the great thing about this is that not only did YouTube bitch-slap her but so did the entire panel of The View… and she deserves every little bit of criticism. After she saw that people were incensed about her video, she turned around and said it’s all in the name of comedy, that it’s merely satire… honestly, it’s just bullying.

I was initially going to add the original video, but you know what? She doesn’t deserve the views. So I instead included the responses of YouTubers, and below you’ll find the video of her guest appearance on The View where she was served so hard, she had to tip. The funny thing is that, although she claims to be intelligent and talented, she keeps acting like a ditzy blonde from the very beginning of the interview, responding to Whoopi Goldberg saying her video offended a lot of people, Arbour said: “Frankly, I’m the most offended by my hair in that video...” Have fun!

2. John Burk

This well-mannered fellow, with the appropriately hypocritical tattoo that says “grace” on his forearm, takes his shirt off and then goes on a vitriolic soliloquy about overweight people. After he calls them repulsive, he says that he’s not calling them disgusting… OK, Mr. Pecks, you need to decide. Finally, he attacks the fast food industry, which is what he should concentrate on initially.

In his video response, he says: “f*ck your feelings”, and goes on to talk about arenas, struggling, critics, and jealously. Ironically, at around the 2:32 mark, he talks about the verbal attacks he has received regarding the way he looks… if that isn’t ironic, I don’t know what is… Remember, in his other video, he called people repulsive because they were overweight. He basically calls everyone a loser quickly thereafter…

It took all of my fortitude to get through his entire alpha male rant (complete with a patronizing chuckle) to the end; I wish you the very same fortitude, dear reader.

3. Mike Jeffries – Abercrombie & Fitch

Mike Jeffries, if you’re unfamiliar with the name, is the douchiest CEO in the history of, well, CEOs. Look, I understand wanting you keep a certain look for your brand, but at the same time you might want to check your attitude at the door when making a statement that you want your company to only sell products to cool, good-looking people. Guess what, jackass? That’s completely subjective. But that’s beside the point. He further said that he wanted the brand to be exclusive. He tried to apologize but that actually had the opposite effect and the reemergence of the negative comments actually dropped the company’s market value.

Since we’re on the topic of fashion, allow me to drop a few more shame bombs:

  • In 2009, German fashion design Karl Lagerfeld responded to Brigitte magazine’s decision to use ordinary, realistic-looking models, saying that “nobody wants to see round women”.
  • You probably don’t know Anna Wintour, but she is one of the most influential fashion icons of recent memory. She doesn’t just influence with her personal style, however… No, no, dear, that’s way too “blue collar”. Ms. Wintour also happens to be the eccentric fashion editor of Vogue for the past 27 years (which funny enough is the age she claims to be). She has gone on record saying she told Oprah (you all know who Oprah is) that she would have to lose a few pounds before she could be on the cover of her publication and that she likes her models “Paris thin” and despises fat people… Maybe we should introduce her to Mike Jeffries, but I’m not sure either of them is beautiful enough to fall in love.
  • I’ll paraphrase here, but fashion designer Tom Ford thinks Americans are too fat, Londoners are getting fatter (because it makes complete sense to compare a continent to a city) and that, if he had to talk about “race system and nationalism” (in the great man’s own words), he likes that fact that Chinese people are all slim.

4. Donald Trump

If there is one person on this list that enjoys the taste of sole, it’s Mr. Trump. He has puts his foot in his mouth so frequently, we should start calling it “trumping”. For example, his most recent “trumping” was when he spoke about immigrants and was under the assumption that they were in their majority criminal elements. Ironically, his own grandfather was an immigrant from Germany, but that obviously doesn’t count… I won’t say why, just use your imagination… and the rest of Trump’s presidential campaign.

Anyhow, we are not talking about skeevy racist capitalists, we are talking about skeevy fat-shamers, and Trump is one of them. When 1996’s Miss Universe Alicia Machado gained weight, the Miss Universe Committee began considering stripping her of her crown and in the midst of everything comes in Mr. Trump calling her an “eating machine” and went on to hire a fitness trainer for the Venezuelan beauty queen. Good ole Trump doesn’t know when to stop though, so he proceeded to make sure the whole “weight loss” process was heavily publicized.

Now, as Mr. Trump makes a run for the White House, which I’m sure he will cover in glass and emblazon his name on at its highest point, he has chosen to target comedian Rosie O’Donnell. In a recent candidate debate, coordinator Megyn Kelly started asking Trump: “You’ve called women you don’t like ‘fat pigs’, ‘dogs’, ‘slobs’, and ‘disgusting animals’…” but just make sure that he makes a point that he does not respect any women in any context, he promptly interrupted the mediator to say “Only Rosie O’Donnell”. Which terrifyingly results in fanfare, laughter, and applause from the audience… Really, America? Really?

Do you know of any other shameless fat-shamers? Let us know in the comments section below!

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