Why Would You Do That?! Five Stupid Stunts That Resulted in Pink Slips

Once in a while everyone gets into a bit of hot water. Sometimes our indiscretions are forgivable and other times it would have been wiser to stand under a bee-hive and poke it with a stick repeatedly. That would have been much smarter than what these people did to get fired.

1. Not so sexy nurses

We have seen many people bite the dust because of their social media indiscretion. Two nurses amused by another human being’s indignity took photos of a rectal x-ray and posted it to Facebook. The offending blockage was a result of an adult toy. They weren’t as amused when they landed on the same anatomical area upon being fired.

2. Big Brother is watching

This has nothing to do with a thought crime or double talk but for double over-time. A NYC school employee was fired when he was found to be fudging his work hours. How did they know? They tracked his government issued cell-phone. It’s not just the NSA anymore folks, NYC school district’s got your number too, if you work for them of course. The goverment looking over your shoulder like a creepy teacher trying to look down your shirt is not cool (even if you are a man) but this guy’s lack of intellectual girth goes beyond stealing hours. This is why stupid doesn’t pay. In an a**-backwards kind of way, he was stealing from himself. Waaaa? you say as your monicle falls out. He was a goverment employee right? His salary is paid by taxes. He pays taxes.  

3. Lieutenant Starbucks

Absolute power absolutely corrupts. People that think they have absolute power get double latte hazelnut macchiato-ed. A Daytona Beach, Florida officer received multiple over-priced cups of black Seattle gold (Starbucks street name) for free. When he was denied a cup one day he threatened to ‘delay’ response if anything happened. He was reported, investigated and agreed to polygraph test which he failed. All that for a cup of 7 dollar joe.

4. Crime Scene EMT

OK, this is pretty damn stupid even if it’s allowed the largest of leniencies.  This is as stupid as wearing a bloody pork chop swimsuit and taking a swim in waters of Australia (for those of you that don’t know Australia is home to cute koalas, kangaroos and 5 meter long great white sharks that can swallow a man in a single bite). Funny I mentioned bloody above as this story has to do with a crime scene. Our IQ deficient EMT decided he would like to share his work environment with his Facebook friends. Unfortunately, the snapshot was photo bombed by a strangling victim. OK, I retract my previous comment about stupidity, not that it’s less stupid… its borderline sociopathic. For the love of God, do not allow this dude to meet the two nurses I mentioned before.

5. Social Me-doh!

Hygiene in the food industry is usually highly regulated and controlled. Your kitchen’s surfaces need to be immaculate, all cooking utensils and vessels need to be almost sterilized. This monster of intellect figured if everything else is clean maybe I should be too. The thing is that she decided to wash her ‘giblets’ in the dish sink of the KFC that she worked at. Then she (ok and a few friends, oh gosh I’m going to have make this joke: Birds of a feather flock together I guess) posted photos of said ‘giblet’ cleansing to her MySpace page. She and her bird-brain friends were given the chopping block and I am done with the chicken related puns. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get her unemployment check.  OK, its out of my system, thank you for your patience.

Have you ever been fired or fired someone because of unfathomable levels of stupidity, depravity or dishonesty? Then please share your story with the rest of us in this white box thing below.