We have been social pariahs for all of our lives, while the kids down the street were riding their bikes and throwing their balls at each other (giggidy) we were using fire balls to kill Koopas and Goombas. If you are wondering if you’re a nerd and you understood that reference without clicking the links then I hate to break it to you….you’re a full-fledged nerd my friend. Since we’ve established that you’re a nerd, you know that the moniker comes with mountainous struggles, here are just a few of them.
1. Being uber passionate, while others are just 'meh'
2. Not being understood in certain circles
With great nerd-om comes great knowledge (ha!). To be a respectable nerd you will have to remember directors, esoteric bits of trivia, universes worth of characters and side stories. Which most people won’t give two rats’ asses about…I know that’s the wrong turn of phrase but giving one rat’s ass just didn’t seem enough, non-nerd people really, really couldn’t give a bigger sh*t about nerd stuff. So if you find yourself amongst non-nerds (“normals”) and you go on a soliloquy about the people that can lift Thor’s hammer, you will be approached with a look that can only be described as a combination of pity, boredom and disdain.
It really doesn’t get better though even if you are amongst “your people”. No matter how specific, exacting and obscure a nerd-fact is there is bound to be at least one Hyper-Nerd (patent pending) that will decimate, destroy and correct you into thinking you are also an unknowledgeable “normal”. And this is why we sit by ourselves in the dark, reading comic books, playing video games and thinking which super-power we’d prefer to have.
3. Non-nerds are now claiming the monicker without the work
How many times has this happened to you fellow Nerd:
Normal: What do you like to do in your free time?
To which you courteously (we’re a polite bunch) respond,
Nerd: I like to play video games/read comic books (or Fantasy/Sci-Fi Novels)/play obscure and highly complex board games
Normal: Really? Aren’t you a bit old for that?
Then one seemingly glorious day the “Normal” mistakenly slips into the realm of Nerd and falls into a delectably satisfying face full of video games/comic books (or Fantasy/Sci-Fi Novels)/obscure and highly complex board games, which even to their own surprise they love!
We’ll call them Temp-Nerds because for the first few days they’ll rave about how much they looooved the Nerd-Media they tried. That is until another Normal says the De-Nerd-afing phrase “Oh, Wow….You’re into that kind of stuff?” to which they respond immediately to with “NooOOOooo, no, that’s kid’s and nerd stuff. It sounds like something Tom would be into!” as they both laugh and point at you.
Now the Temp-Nerd turns into an Underground Nerd, which hides away in deep recess and cave-like structures to indulge in their Nerd-Needs, like a drug addict, and will deny any involvement with such disgusting, deplorable things. But even secretly they’re one of us now…you can see their ears involuntarily perk up when you mention the new Assassin’s Creed game.